Cancer News Information

I have a long-standing argument with my professor brother, a brilliant intellectual trained in the hallowed halls of Berkeley. It usually starts with me saying something like: why is it that so and so never seems to make it our parties? Then my brother would reply that it is because they are busy, to which I would counter that we are all busy and can always make time. And then he would retort, that sometimes life takes over and people who might want to do something don't always get that choice. That's when I say, but we always have a choice, and that's how we would start to argue about the concept of freedom and choice.

Our discussions have been legendary, often spanning hours and clearing rooms. I think there is some family drama dynamic that drives it, but there is also a piece where we are confronting something important in ourselves. Can we really have choice, go for it, do what we really want to do? Is there something external stopping us making us victims of fate? Is it a mix?

I will concede this much, that we are not in control of life. Much of it is predetermined, like our birth, gender, sexual orientation, family, environment. But as Andy, the character in Shawshank Redemption, reminds us - there are things that no one can take away from us. In his case it was the music, but for us it can be our dreams, passions, possibilities, whatever we choose it to be.

I say this because it is true for me. There have been times when things really did not seem to work, when the game seemed over, and somehow there was a way. But rather than go onto some personal and possibly irrelevant examples, I would rather, in deference to Cancer Awareness month cite two very powerful cases that have inspired this line of thinking for me.

Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim, who I studied with a number of years ago, is a unique individual. She is the first Grandmaster in traditional Korean martial arts, who won many competitions against men, coached the American Tae Kwon Do team, and who also met a number of American presidents. Yet, in her early 30's she was diagnosed with cancer and was told she would die. A fighter till the end, she said she would heal herself with fasting and meditation and for 30 days she locked herself in a room and did that. When she came out she was cancer free.

Dirk Benedict, who I enjoyed in my formative years, for TV shows that were my staple like Battle Star Galactica and The A-Team, always seemed like a cool guy. What I didn't know at the time was that at the height of his career, he developed Prostate cancer. Already a vegetarian of many years he turned to Macrobiotics and fasting to help save his life. In his book the Confessions of a Kamikaze Cowboy, he explains how he went into the woods thinking he will be healed by living naturally or die there. But as the book proves, he came out healthier than he went in.

We often think of cancer as a death sentence, and it is for many people. But like those mentioned above, and a number of people I know personally, this isn't the case. For them it was a way to reconnect to themselves and find ways to really live.

Bernie Siegel in one of his early books, Faith, Hope and Healing, talks about a number of people who have chosen a different way and freed themselves of disease and other burdens, finding a new, and sometimes more inspired life as a result. As he will point out, not everyone who embarks on this path is always successful, but usually they live longer and have decidedly better lives than they started out with. They knew they had a choice, and made the best of their circumstances.

While I may never win the debate with my brother, for me that does not matter as much as the idea that if all these people can face something so scary and so impossible as cancer and still live as they choose, then I have to ask myself, why can't we?